Learn to love the ride

As cheesy as it gets life is a roller coaster. So is relationships, career, and love. When you pick up on the speed, it is first scary. You scream your lungs out. Then you realize the excitement and the rush. You get used to the danger and the speed. You enjoy the up. And then there comes the down. Well, its no fun. It feels like they are pulling your body down in an extreme speed while it is still trying to go up. There is a very heavy feeling in your chest and almost crushing your heart. It is not always a steep down. Sometimes its like a little bump that throws you off of your seat slightly. You try to settle back until the next one. That is if you can.

But if you ride the roller coaster over and over again, you don't close your eyes anymore when it is speeding up. A little "whoa" comes between your lips but you won't be screaming like the first time. You are now prepared for the bumps and downs. You position yourself. You know what to do or not to do the next time not to lose your balance.

Your goal might challenge you, running after the dream job might burn you out, the love might emotionally bring you up or bring you down. Nothing in life is actually consistent. Nothing is ever all good at the same time altogether. How you want to roll with this is entirely up to you. I sometimes feel that I am strong and can survive anything; at times feel really tired of all and want a break from life (and all the subset of things). I don't think what to do is a straight forward answer. I can't pretend something is not bothering me when it is eating me up inside. I am not the type of person (unfortunately) who can just ignore things and say fuck it. 

Thats why I am a strong believer in communication. For all the aspects of life. If there is a bump ahead of me at work, it will help me to know what is the situation that sets the dynamics, what are the options, what is the bet. If the relationship with my friends/boyfriend feels like it is lacking something, I prefer to talk the person directly, voice what feels like a problem. Most of the time it turns out what I think is the problem, is not an issue after all; just a communication breakdown. It just requieres clarification.

So if you know there will be a ride in advance, if you at least know what you can expect, know at which turn the crazy upside down part comes up and at which point the roller coaster will go down at the craziest speed, you will set yourself for it. You will know there will be the part you'll enjoy the hell out of it. 

What stopping my yoga practices taught me

Yoga has been the most self-teaching tool, idea, light, way in my life. Writing this post right after my practice on my matt should compliment that belief.

How yoga became a big part of me and when I realized all the teaching yoga kept inside was little over a year ago when I had to travel to India for work. I was supposed to spend two weeks, my main goal being training other people. Until then, I used to practice what you can sort of call yoga once a week. India was overall a transformative travel that marks an important place in my life. It hugely owes this reputation to yoga. 

Right before my travel and having read "Eat, Pray, Love", I was determined to find a yoga studio, or even a small retreat. Going through pages of search results in the internet, I saved couple places I put my mind to visit. I was thinking perhaps I will do yoga once or twice during my stay in India. 

The first day after visiting our office and coming back to my fairy tale like hotel (actually palace), I went for a run on the treadmill. I was not too excited about the treadmill as a person who likes running outside; but oh well. On my way back from gym, I saw this post hanging on the wall. It said yoga - studio by the near the pool - at 5:30 am. Yes 5:30. Yes AM. I thought that is way too early for any kind of exercise. But it was right there. It would be very convenient. Decided to give it a shot the next morning.

Barely making myself out of the bed, I showed up 2 minutes before the class. It was right at dawn, little cool, but by no means cold, very fresh air. The studio as described was overlooking at the pool, all glass windows on the side. Not too big. Maybe for 6-7 people max. Another guy showed up right after our teacher arrived. Starting from that day, that morning, that was it. Every morning I happily made myself be ready for our practice at dawn, with birds singing at the background.

Over the two weeks I spent there, I realized how much I manage to accomplish and that I am more capable than I thought. How even in the most challenging positions I was able to keep calm like there is no struggle. I saw how my body and soul felt better. There was serenity and happiness. I literally felt like a super woman, like nothing really can get to me. Because I found the power within me. 

After my India trip I kept practicing. Like almost everyday. Some days twice perhaps. I couldn't get enough of how it made me feel. Recently, however, due to so many reasons I haven't been able to practice. Not because I was done with yoga, not even close. I was busy running a half-marathon, taking advantage of beautiful Californian weather to do all outdoorsy activities. Then the moment came when I realized how much I missed yoga and I started practicing again. Thats when it hit me. All the things I could easily do, all the asanas were harder now. I wasn't as flexible. I wasn't as strong. My level deteriorated. I was disappointed in myself. This came as another teaching itself too. In different aspects:

-You can't take anything granted. What you have now might not be there forever. Acknowledge it.

-If you don't practice what you are good at you will get rusty. You can't rely on it anymore. 

-Good news. It is never the end of the road. You can always work on bettering yourself and the situations you are in. 

All loops back to one thing in my mind: "I bend, so I don't break". Mentally and physically.

Namaste.

Perks of being a Voyager

The distance whether in terms of miles or emotions I realized is the best tool of self-awareness.

I find myself relieved, relaxed and calm when I distance myself  away from the feelings and people who brings chaos into my life. When these people (or the feelings these people make me feel) trouble the calm waters, I lose the clarity on the things really makes me happy and I enjoy. Then I realize the the uneasy feeling. I don't panic though. However, slowly but surely I step away. One step at a time. Either go away somewhere, spend a day at a favorite spot, go for a run, do yoga... The first few days/weeks of distancing away is a challenge. But at this point I learned that it is a trait I trained myself to be better at for the better or worse. But oh man, once you are over the hill, you pick up speed. And just like magic: poof!

Things get brighter, you are independent and free, you can barely contain your soul of all the excitement small things bring to your life.

One of the best part is you honestly don't care. Don't care if  these people or situations are still around or not, don't care what they think, don't care if they exist. Even better, let them think they had you at your best when they haven't even seen the tip of the iceberg.

Don't Date a Girl Who Travels

Don’t date a girl who travels

Golden State of Mind

As of today it has been a month since I moved to San Francisco. I already feel like I always lived here. You know the feeling you get when you are where you meant to be? It is exactly what I feel. I belong here. I belonged here even before I moved here for good. In each business trip to San Francisco I knew one day I would live here.

I am over the moon that one day happened. Of course the experience you get on your trips and actually living here is different.

First of all, lets get it straight. My hair obviously behaves differently between Irish and Californian weather. I got to learn how to tame it quickly (needed to buy a strong hair dryer!). The second point I got to learn fast was replacing the umbrella I had to carry around all four seasons in Ireland with sunglasses. So, actually sunglasses are more than an accessory here and it finally makes sense that I have 4 pair of sunglasses (and can get even more!).

When it comes to daily life you can't standardize it. There is something new everyday. Many random people, places, events, scenes... So many times when you are walking down on the street which is in no particular area of the city or even popular, you see things that makes you smile. The houses are different than each other, yet in a great harmony. There are paintings on the walls, sidewalks,  balloons, fans, lights, hanging down the trees and electric wires, there is color everywhere in a way that doesn't stick into your eye.

There is variety in this city. In so many aspects, in so many levels. Maybe it all occurs to me because Dublin was a small city compared to a standard city size. It is an island after all. It will always be my tiny, cosy, lucky charm. A place I called home for 4,5 years. A special place in my heart. But the things I have here,  the variety of options and liveliness of the city reassures me that this city is more "me". 

Every neighborhood has a personality. You try to find the best that matches your lifestyle; because you know that will be the first thing people ask you when you meet them. You are identified with it like the color of your eye and your name. So you gotta be careful what you want people to think of you. 

I am excited and hopeful for all the things this city will bring to me. I know I found the one. 

I was out to brunch with my cousin last Saturday right before our furniture and home store marathon for my new apartment and I found how I would summarize this city. It was written on a big white wall. I didn't pay attention at first glance, but when I looked up once again, it did strike my attention and I couldn't have said it better myself:

Goodbye's not forever

 

I said many goodbyes since my childhood. Changed schools, cities, countries. And not once but for the third time now changing the country.

Although this move is so different than others and this move is solely my move, my dream; it still came down to the most difficult part.

In three days I am leaving Ireland for good and starting a new life in San Francisco. I didn't doubt about my decision for a second. However, I will for sure miss Ireland after spending 4,5 years here. I will miss the green, the countless rainbows, seals in Howth, the countryside, the castle in Kildare, the view in Kinsale, random moments of sunshine, crossing Samuel Beckett bridge everyday, the perfect pint of Guinness, and everything about Dublin. Ireland has a big piece in me; I have Irishness deep inside even though I would deny it. At the end, you can take the girl out of Dublin, but you can't take Dublin out of the girl.

But that's not it. What I will miss the most is the people. People I met here in my Irish story. They are from all around the world. They are Korean, Brazilian, Danish, Italian, Irish, Spanish, Turkish, Romanian.

We spent the most important, maybe most conscious years of our lives together. We became confidants, a big family. We supported each other through every difficulty, we became the safety net, we laughed over so many happy moments (and over so many bottles of wine), we completed each other in so many ways. We picked each other up, we push each other up to next level, we saw each other grow, evolve & even leave.

Yes, I will make new friends wherever I go. Yes, I already have good friends over there. But these people in my life are so unique, I can't think of any possible way to replace them. Their place in my heart will always be so different. I fail to find enough words to explain my love for them, for their place in my heart, what they are to me in my life.

I know this is not a goodbye for good. At some place, at some time we will see each other again. We will make it happen. They will still be in my life despite the 8h time difference. I have no doubt.

Then there is a goodbye for an unfinished story in my life. The one that I know won't be in my life against all odds unlike the others I mentioned. The story will be done without the conclusion. It will always be up in the air. But it will be done. Maybe that's why it will be my hardest goodbye.

Last night, over a dinner, one of my dear friend showed me a quotation from a book.

It said: Love stays with us. Even though they are gone from our lives there is an indefinable bond between the two that cannot be untied. 

Knowing this, I will carry the unfinished story in my heart, thinking of it nicely, remembering it each time I have sushi or eat carbonara or drink spritz in a sunny afternoon or every time I go for a run. Knowing this, I know where ever we go around the world, my tie with the people who matters the most will always be there, not even a tiny bit weaker with time.

So yes, the goodbye to my Irish story out of all the goodbyes I had in my life will be the hardest. 

I will miss each of you deeply, everyday. You each know who you are ♥

Sláinte.

My attraversiamo story - First moments in Rome

This is my first note I wrote when I arrived to Rome on last Thursday the 16th of January; part of little travel diaries I keep. But I knew I kind of wrote it to share here. I took some parts out that I wanted to keep only for myself, but the most is there. So here it goes with a little delay.

"I just came to Rome, to where I am staying (piazza del gesu luxury suites, great view by the way). Greeted by this super nice Italian lady. Had my first espresso, and then went out. Really calm and warm weather. 

Mind you, it was around 22:30. Came to a pizza place nearby called Rossopomodoro. Luckily they have free wifi. But more than that they say they have pizza from Naples. Either way Pizza had to be the first thing I order in Italy. So I did, with a glass of white house wine, which came as a dry and little sparkly as my waiter already warned me when I was ordering it. 

Turns out (and probably having the shittiest pizza according to Italians but still) I never had pizza in my life ever before. Turns out it was a big lie I was eating. I was in no carbs diet and high amount of exercise which I just broke with a huge margarita pizza. And I can only say I am glad I did. 

Three months after India, here I am, in Rome, by myself. I feel like i am living a mini version of "Eat Pray Love". Only my version goes as pray, eat (and hopefully) love. But maybe this is even more special. Because it is the first time I am alone for a holiday. Even though my alone holiday will be less than 24 hours, I still feel a weird pleasure. I came earlier than everybody else, for myself. I came to a restaurant having pizza and wine and truly enjoying now. At the end, this is what months of yoga has taught me. 

Right now, I have no worries. I can only feel lucky to have my life. I feel I live. And I will remember not to give this up for anything or anybody. Even though the purpose of this trip to surprise one of my best friends, in this moment, right this moment, it is about me and all this happiness I feel.  

Yet again, people disappoint, but pizza is eternal. (But hope not the calories :))"

Not all who wander are lost

When there are so many things going on your life, in different levels of your life, it is like a roller coaster of emotions. I don't think I should try to contain them, rather surf on these waves. Looking at my childhood I was never constrained with limits thanks to my parents. We moved to a different city when I was 10. Maybe it was the first of many major changes that would come through. Maybe leaving my childhood friends, my house, the streets that I play and the palm trees behind is what made me quite adaptable person.

I got used taking the leap and know that net appears as I go along. If something looks scary, it becomes even more tempting for me. I might be hurt if I do it, I might not fit in (not that it ever happened:), I might be challenged until all settles. But how would I know if it is the right decision if I never make it.

Change scares people. For a person who can easily get attached to things emotionally like me, I am also scared of being ordinary, being boring. I follow my feelings most of the time. In the head vs heart game, my heart always wins. It gets me into trouble, it gets broken; but it is me, it is what makes me. It is also what got me where I am now. If I were to just follow logical patterns, I don't think I would be where I am right now. 

And the important thing that I am proud of is not being where I am now, but being happy with it. Happy that I fell, I struggled, I went to top and to bottom, got hurt, laughed and cried for hours, found myself on so many random days, nights, events. At the end of the day I make it work for me. I even feel blessed to have my life with all its hardships and joys.

Just a desk move triggered this post. I guess this is my 6th or 7th desk in 3 years including different buildings. I feel this is definitely not the last one.

Then I see people who are not ready for new things, moves, relationships, love, job. In fact, I know couple people like this and their stagnant point of views feels like winter on a hot summer day on the beach. But, if not now, then when?

Priorities: Do What Really Matters

 

So, I am a hard-working person who is really passionate about what she does and her company. I do my job in the best possible way and look ways to improve myself and climb up the stairs of my career. 2 years ago, if you asked me, I would say the most important thing in my life is my career. I don't know if it is to do with age, maturity, experiences or new point of view, my thoughts changed.

I still love my job and feel passionate about it. I am extremely excited what is yet to come in the next couple of months. But. There is a but. I now feel that career is nothing if you are not living the life out there. If you are not watching the sunset, not sharing drinks and laughing over stories with friends, not dancing till morning, not having a nice dinner with your family, not jumping into the sea from the pier, not having sushi and vanilla ice cream nights, not going for a run...

There is a whole life out there and what you can do is limitless. I recently read a very short article from former CEO of Coca-Cola Bryon Dyson which hit me in the heart. It basically says out of work, family, health, friends and spirit the only replaceable one is work. If the others are broken, you cannot mend them. However, you can always work. You can always earn some money to live. You can pick it up where you left.

With this I am even more inspired to live, experience what I haven't yet, enjoy new things, have more fun, fall in love, create memories. Then work and my career would (hopefully) be even richer with this. I am not saying, quit your job. I am just saying remember the life outside of it. Career can't complete you, living does.

Looking Forward

So I realized (especially lately) I am always counting down for something. Counting down for a holiday, counting down for a girls night out, counting down for sushi & vanilla ice cream nights, counting down for the launch event of a project... List goes on and on. With everything going on, I am stopping myself once in a while and looking back. Here is what I am feeling:

Wow, how the hell time passed this quickly... and how full of laughter, happiness, events, celebrations, partying and traveling of it. Do I want to stop? Certainly not. Looking forward to travels, things, feelings, dates, girls nights, kisses and texts is what makes it this valuable and priceless. Only trick here is to stop. Not to stop looking forward. But stopping to realize what is going on without questioning, worrying, details and enjoying the moment. Realize your feelings, the sun on your skin, the breeze as you are running, the moment makes you smile, taste of that delicious food, laughter you are sharing.

At the end, it is good be a free soul, not making plans, and living the moment as long as you know how far you can stretch.

Friday, Holiday & Happiness

I woke up super happy today. I put on a summery dress, went out walking in the sunny weather to work. Got croissants for myself and friends from the Italian bakery in the corner. Came work and started working. Tasks and projects seems to be easily flying away with my mood. 

I don't know if it is because I am already done with most of my packing one day in advance of my travel (for the first time!), the dinner date I have tonight, or maybe simply it is Friday. Or it is the combination of all.

I am thinking how can I have more days like this. Is it the external conditions that sets this cheerful girl inside of me? Or does it come deep within? I think one should be able to make it come from inside which in turn will effect the outside factors.

If you are not a happy person inside, if you cannot find happiness inside by yourself, no matter what happens around you, it wouldn't be ever enough for you. You would maybe be more materialistic. Finding that point inside is not an easy one. Comes with a lot of experiences, listening to yourself, knowing what you really want. And no. I haven't been able to keep that everyday. I don't think it is human to be that optimistic. Nothing is that pink in real life. It is just the matter of remembering that you are the control of your happiness even in times it seems out of your hands.

I can't wait for tonight, I can't wait for tomorrow. I will be toes in the sand, sun in my hand as of tomorrow, breathing the sea breeze.

Cheers to that! And Happy Friday!

Everything Happens for a Reason

Things change fast. Things change fast in a good way. One second feels like million years and it feels dark. The next is very bright. Then you appreciate the darkness. Relief. Serenity. Feeling like living again. Loving every moment, every second. 

Just take a deep breath. Close your eyes. Enjoy the scene, happiness and love you feel deep in your heart. Get lost in it.

100th Post!

This is my 100th blog post! Unbelievable that I wrote that many. In honor of this, I have a new design and I am loving it.

I also wanted to do something different for this post and decided to list 100 thing that I like to do, things I can't give up, things that are part of me.

Here we go (in no particular order):

1. Bruno (my dog)

2. LinkedIn

3. Starbucks 

4. San Francisco

5. Summer

6. Guildford

7. Baking spontaneously

8. Maldives

9. Cup of coffee in a rainy day by the window

10. Reading 

11. Shopping

12. Decorating my home

13. Catching up with old friends

14. Girls night out

15. Doing sports

16. My plants

17. Alacati

18. My high school friends

19. Weekend breakfasts

20. Christmas joy

21. Opening/Giving presents

22. Little suprises

23. Work gatherings 

24. Guinness

25. Watermelon

26. Sea

27. Planning trips

28. My first visit to NYC

29. Serenity

30. Animals

31. Cupcakes

32. In-N-Out

33. Mom & Dad

34. Boxes - yes, weird but i like different boxes

35. My urbanears headphones

36. Handbags

37. Swimming

38. Frozens in a hot summer day

39. Ice cream

40. Home stores

41. Photo frames

42. Laduree macarons

43. London

44. My mug collection 

45. "Keep Kalm and Carry On" signs

46. Tanning (under real sun)

47. Sea shells

48. Losing myself in Sephora

49. iPhone

50. Barcelona

60. Palm trees

61. Sunset

62. Irish pubs

63. Candles

64. Looking at old pictures

65. Keeping all sorts of tickets, brochures from important events and trips

66. Wine & Cheese

67. Teacups

68. Crêpes

69. Ballet pumps

70. Tapas & Sangria

71. Driving

72. Coconut juice

73. Wine therapy events with girls from work

74. Ikea

75. Walking around in a new city

76. Watching the moon with a telescope

77. Disney/Pixar movies

78. Turquoise 

79. French manicure

80. Spa

81. Horse riding

82. Country side

83. P&J

84. Soup and bread in a cold day

85. Volleyball

86. Coco Mademoiselle

87. Sushi

88. Nail colors

89. Foosball

90. Chocolate

91. Blue sky

92. Brunch

93. Italian food

94. Lavender

95. Black eyeliner

96. My Nespresso coffee maker

97. Monopoly with friends

98. Nutella

99. Being girly

100. Snow

There! I made it!

Laters all!

 image: thefashiondish.com

Just a Dog

Just a Dog

From time to time people tell me, "Lighten up. It's just a dog." or "That's a lot of money for just a dog."

They don't understand the distance traveled, time spent or costs involved for "Just a dog".

Some of my proudest moments have come about with "Just a dog."

Many hours have passed with my only company being "Just a dog". 

And not once have I felt slighted. 

Some of my saddest  moments were brought about by "Just a dog".

In those days of darkness, the gentle touch of "Just a dog" provided comfort and purpose to overcome the day. 

If you, too, think it's "Just a dog", you will probably understand phrases like "Just a friend" or "Just a sunrise" or "Just a promise".

"Just a dog" brings into my life the very essence of friendship, trust, and pure unbridled joy.

 "Just a dog" brings out the compassion and patience that make me a better person.

Because of "Just a dog" I will rise early, take long walks, and look longingly into the future.

For me and people like me, it's not "Just a dog".

It's an embodiment of all the hopes and dreams of the future, the fond memories of the past,

 and the pure joy of the moment.

"Just a dog" brings out what's good in me and diverts my thoughts away from myself and 

the worries of the day. 

I hope that someday people can understand it's not "Just a dog." 

It's the thing that gives me humanity and keep me from being "Just a man" or "Just a woman".

So the next time you hear the phrase "Just a dog", Smile because they "Just don't understand"..

-Unknown Author

 courtesy of: Jeans and Tees and Travel and Cakes: Just a Dog.

Lazy Saturday

Today everyone seems to feel very lazy for some unknown reason. Maybe it is the cold weather which seems to deceive you by the look of it. It is still cold, spring is not here yet... So Dublin weather is like social networking. You wait for the follower base, that friendship request, or that business /opportunity message. However, you have to keep in mind that you can't wear summer clothes even in spring. Without the your target audience, that message, opportunity or brand awareness you expect eagerly will not come. You always need to have your coat with you for the wind and your umbrella for the rain. If it is sunny, your audience will make you shine. If the weather is bad, you will use your protective tools to embrace your connections or followers. Thats a two way road. 

Dream you don't know about

A new year = A new Me?

Everyone talks about starting on a clean sheet in the year as if the change in one digit means a renovation. I don't believe in that. One does what she has in mind. No need to wait for a new year, a new week, a new opportunity. I should myself be the tool to create a new opportunity for myself. I should have the will power to start my diet on Wednesday, and not wait until the Monday. 

If I wanna be a new me, I should start from my routines. I understand that starting a new year psychologically has an impact on people. It definitely marks the start of a new year and one can take advantage from it. 

However, girls and boys, if you have a spark in you, no need to wait. You can begin your career, love, health, whatever transformation when you feel it is a good time.

Friday - Let the Party Begin!

In the past two days I wasn't so good - meaning I've got cold and been staying at home to get better. Meanwhile, my past months have been all about organizing my best friend's bachelorette party which is tomorrow. And I was saying everyone to keep good care of themselves until the party. Look who caught the virus...

Anyway, I have been resting and taking vitamins to get ready for tomorrow. My bachelorette party was only 6 of months ago and it was a hell of  a party. Of course, what happens in the hen party, stays in the hen party. So, here we are again, 6 months later. Did all my best, used all the possible resources and waiting to see my best friend's face in every moment of our "Tea Party". I hope it will be a memory she will remember all her life with all the fun and laughter.

Lisya, this post is dedicated to you, my dear friend, my sister. I wish all the happiness in your life and hope you enjoy tomorrow. Remember, it is all for you.

December Inspiration

After almost a year, hello Sparkly Peach, hello dear blog, hello writing, hello joyful times, hello December. What hold me back was nothing. Just the pure happiness I couldn't stop enjoying. So much happened, wanted so much to share. But all was so unique experiences that I couldn't spare anytime to write. So how about making this up with what I have missed to write like my wedding, my honeymoon, trips to States, wonderful work times...

Feels already good to be writing again.

Happy INternational

Look how long I have been away. More than a month. So much happened and I didn't write anything on purpose. Didn't want to jinx anything. 

I now have a new job, new sweet colleagues, I feel extremely happy and dying to go to work every morning. Week days which I have been counting down every minute pass, seems so short now. Everything has paid off. Its the time of my life. 

In addition, I am writing this post at the date LinkedIn (my new dear company) announced to go public. So many good things waiting to happen, so many things I am ready to do. Watch closely!